The Jon and Carrie Love Story, part 13

When my parents first met, my mom was already engaged. That guy left on his mission, and my dad (who apparently already "knew" mom was the one) became her good, good, goooood friend. Two years of getting closer, writing each other during the summers, helping each other with papers, or driving my mom all the way to L.A. ... Boy was dad a patient man! By the time the missionary came back, it was clear neither he nor my mom were feeling it. They mutually broke it off. My parents were engaged a week later. A year later, after both walking out of BYU graduation together, they were married in the Los Angeles Temple.

My parents are still best friends. They are both very independent people, they are very passionate about their own things, but when they come together an amazing thing takes place. They are giddy, laughing, and the whole world seems right. Even now, being "old and fat" as my dad would say, it's clear they are in love, even from across the room. They appreciate each other. They have the same goals. They are already living like it's eternity.

That, dear friends, is the pedestal of marriage of which I had to contend. Everyday I saw how awesome marriage could be. And nothing less than that amazing union would do for me. Now when I say "I was picky about boys" (see Part 10) do you agree that I had a valid reason? I had always wanted what my parents had. I wanted true love in every sense of the word.

I didn't know how it would happen. Luck I guess. Lots of praying. Divine intervention.

I had been to countless EFY classes (Especially For Youth, sort of a spiritual "summer camp" for LDS teens), firesides talks, talks with friends, talks with engaged people, talks with my married sister or even my parents. I studied out the idea of finding a spouse pretty well. One thing I learned, know what you want. Don't just flop around and figure something good will show up. Make a list of the qualities you want in a spouse, and then aspire to live and be those same qualities. Don't make finding a spouse your focus in life, actually don't think about it if you can help it, but know what you want-- then get on with life.

So I made a list in my journal. Outgoing. Funny, Strong testimony. A million other things. Probably two pages? Yeah, I was a little neurotic. I was single! Gimme a break! But early on, I had a fairly clear picture of what my future husband would be like. At least on the inside. Then I tried to go on with my life. I tried to change and become the person Heavenly Father wanted me to be, who I thought I could possibly be.

Remember how I thought I'd marry someone who was tall, thin, brown haired, brown eyed, who was two years older and had a master's degree? And he'd be CALM? (see Part 5) Yeah right... so anyway, eventually I had to let go of that outer image. As time went on, and I went from 21, to 22... and eventually to 25, my mind softened a bit. I was still picky, but not about the outside.

Eventually I forgot the list even existed. I had taken a long break from writing in my journal. For so long, mostly in middle school and high school, I was a faithful journal writer (read more about what I wrote about here). It would take a major life-changing event before I would crack it open again.

Later, after learning more about Jon, experiencing life with him for a little while and getting engaged (oh be quiet, you know the ending anyway!), I was in my room alone, feeling very poetic. So I dug out my journal, something I hadn't done in a great while. I wrote something rather sappy (maybe I'll share later if you beg), and then I flipped through the pages to see what I had written before.

I found the list.

I had a ring on my finger, and now I was about to take the true test. Had I found the one I had been searching for? The one I really, truly wanted my whole life?

I read through the list, attribute by attribute. Outgoing. Funny. Strong testimony. And on and on. Two pages! Tears started streaming down my face.

Jon was the one. He had every single one of those attributes. Including my heart.

And now, back to our second date. >>Continue to Part 14